What Can Go Wrong in the Surrogacy Journey: Risks Intended Parents and Surrogates Should Know
Surrogacy is a beautiful and life-changing journey but it’s not without its challenges. Whether you’re an intended parent or a surrogate, it’s essential to understand that surrogacy comes with emotional, medical, legal, and financial risks. Being informed is the first step in preparing for a smoother, more successful experience.
In this blog, we’ll walk you through what are some of the pieces that can go wrong during the surrogacy process, so you know what to watch out for and how to plan ahead.
1. Failed Egg Retrieval or Poor Egg Quality or Poor Sperm Quality
One of the earliest steps in the surrogacy process involves creating embryos through IVF. Sometimes, egg retrievals can fail or yield poor-quality eggs, even with a healthy donor or intended mother. This can delay or derail the process and require additional cycles. The same applies to sperm quality and creating good quality embryos. This is why we do not accept Intended Parents that do not have embryos ready as we know the situation can take time and may take several tries.
What to consider:
Use clinics with proven success rates.
Discuss backup plans for additional egg retrievals or donors.
Know this may take longer than expected or take several tries
2. Embryo Issues or Failed Fertilization
Even when eggs and sperm are healthy, embryos may fail to fertilize, or their quality may be too low for transfer. In some cases, embryos don’t survive freezing or thawing.
Tip:
Ask your clinic about fertilization and blastocyst formation rates, as well as genetic testing (PGT) options.
3. Multiple Failed Transfers
It’s a difficult truth that not every embryo transfer results in pregnancy. Multiple failed transfers can lead to emotional distress, financial strain, and delays.
What helps:
Work with a clinic that customizes protocols for the surrogate.
Be flexible and know there will be some sort of speed bump along this process
4. Changing Clinics Mid-Journey
If there are complications or dissatisfaction with a fertility clinic, switching clinics mid-journey can create logistical and emotional challenges.
Risk factors:
Additional costs
Delayed timelines
Lost embryos if shipping isn’t handled correctly
The new clinic approving and screening the Gestational Carrier again.
5. Needing a New Surrogate Midway
Medical or personal issues may prevent a surrogate from continuing. If a carrier becomes medically disqualified or backs out or Intended Parents want a different match, finding a new one can take months.
Prevent this:
Use agencies with strong screening and support systems.
Discuss backup plan options early in the process.
Be open and willing to have conversations with the agency and even a mental health professional.
6. Unforeseen or Rising Clinic Costs
Fertility treatment is expensive, and unexpected costs can arise — especially if extra medications, tests, or procedures are needed. Some clinics may not be upfront about all fees, leaving intended parents surprised.
Avoid surprises:
Ask for a clear, itemized cost estimate.
Understand what’s included in packages.
Budget for additional monitoring, travel or lost wages costs
The more time and the more transfers it takes, the more it will cost, not including if you need to make more embryos or want to move clinics
7. Misleading “Guaranteed” Programs
Some fertility clinics and surrogacy agencies offer “guaranteed baby” programs — but many of these come with fine print. They often don’t guarantee a child, but rather a set number of IVF cycles or embryo transfers. They also come at a disadvantage to someone either your surrogate, other intended parents or surprises for you later.
Do this:
Ask exactly what’s guaranteed — and what’s not.
Read the refund policy carefully.
8. Pregnancy Complications or Loss
Even after a confirmed pregnancy, medical risks remain. Miscarriage, preterm labor, or health concerns for the surrogate can impact the journey.
Key consideration:
Ensure the surrogate has access to quality prenatal care.
Emotional support for all parties is essential.
Communication is key, especially about any triggers or difficult times
9. Breakdowns in Communication
One of the most overlooked risks is poor communication between intended parents, surrogates, agencies, or clinics. This can lead to confusion, frustration, and even legal issues.
Improve outcomes:
Set expectations early.
Maintain open, respectful, and regular communication.
Know this process takes a lot of trust and loss of control, knowing everyone is working toward the same goal – healthy baby.
10. Not Feeling Supported
Surrogates and intended parents both need emotional and logistical support. Without it, the process can feel overwhelming and isolating.
Ask about:
Support services from your agency or clinic
Counseling or peer support networks
11. Not Following the Legal Contract or Guidelines
Unfortunately, some parties don’t fully understand or follow the legal contract, which can lead to disputes over decision-making, money, or post-birth agreements.
Protect yourself:
Use experienced surrogacy attorneys for both parties.
Make sure everyone clearly understands the contract terms.
Don’t jump to conclusions, communicate about any issues
12. Not Allowing the Surrogate to See the Baby After Birth
A surprisingly painful issue can arise when intended parents deny the surrogate a chance to see or say goodbye to the baby. While not generally legally required, this can cause emotional trauma. Even touching base after everyone goes home can mean a lot.
Best practice:
Include clear expectations about birth plans and hospital time in your contract.
Be clear about what you expect or want when everyone goes home, you still want to consider how the other party is feeling and doing.
13. Either Party Backs Out
Sadly, there are situations where a surrogate or intended parents change their mind — before the embryo transfer, during pregnancy, or even after birth. This is rare but emotionally and legally complex.
What to do:
Ensure strong screening for commitment.
Work with professionals who mediate and support both sides.
Conclusion: Understanding Surrogacy Risks Helps You Prepare for Success
While there are many things that can go wrong in a surrogacy journey, most of these challenges can be mitigated through careful planning, clear communication, legal protections, and emotional support. Working with experienced professionals and asking the right questions can make all the difference.
Surrogacy is deeply rewarding but it’s essential to go in informed, empowered, and supported every step of the way.